Hope. That is a great word but in my past, it has gotten me in troulble. I consider myself very optimistic, hopefully, guallble, you name it. I just believed the best in people and tried my best to give the benefit of the doubt in a lot of situations. However, it taught me some hard lessons. I had an old boss to tell me that I was too trusting and that I should watch that because people are mean. She was right. And I learned not to even trust her. I had wanted to believe that there were some good in this world but for the most part I saw some misery. Now every situation was not bad but it all was matter of prespective. Then my perspective changed and I changed. I believe people were out to hurt me and no one could be trusted. This craziness spilled over into the relationship I had with my children’s father. Now he had his own moments where I should not have trusted him but I didn’t offer him a chance to show me other wise too. Thus our relationship was doomed from the start and now we don’t even speak. Too much damage and all the hope is lost. I wish i was the person that I am today during that time. Then maybe we each could have learned to learn and lean on God. Then our hope would have been restored. The overall lesson I learned is that is ok for me to hope for things and learn that if it does not work out then it is ok. And I must keep God in the midst of it all because where is hope there is faith and without faith we can not please Him. The journey is about pleasing God. I hope that journey never ends.
For years, It seemed to that I had to control everything. It really stems from my childhood. My childhood was filled with fun yet it was filled with sometimes abousive father who devalued women and targeted my mother. So day from to day, you never knew what to expect. As an adult, I learned much more about the psychology of behavior and in fact, my father was a product of his environment. Thus learned behavior thrived. I thought his behavior did not effect me but it really did. In the last few years, i realized that it effected me in positive and negative ways. Now what does this have to do with surrender vs. personal control? Everything because I knew God and believed in him, yet I did not trust him? He knew how our father was and he put us in that situation. I questioned how could I trust him? I was a fraid of letting go and surrending to his plan. He knew of the things that I endured would strengthen me and be apart of my ministry of helping others. I have a heart for marriages and relationships. Yet I haven’t had a successful relationship but that is ok. According to Gary Smalley I don’t have to perfect or in a relationship to help people in relationships. it is a war against the family and we must be ready to fix it. So I surrender to that purpose; to see families make it. We are charged to help heal the broken and help people learn to love and laugh. Help heal the pains.
Please join us on August 24, 2013 from 10am to 1pm for a fun filled Makeup Application Workshop. This exciting event will be filled latest makeup tips and techniques. This course is open for all; whether it is your first time applying makeup or an experience makeup maven. This is the workshop for you. The fee is $15.00 which includes Small Make-Up Supply Kit.
Posing for shots.